Album Review | Tech N9ne – Welcome To Strangeland

This is Tech N9ne’s twelfth album and it’s the fourth in his “Collabos” series. It came out in November of 2011. I’ll probably really like this since it’s a Collabos album. I probably won’t think this is wack. I’m gonna be listening to the standard edition of this album, which has 15 tracks. This’ll be the shortest Tech N9ne review I’ve done so far. Even the deluxe edition only has 18 tracks, which is long for most artists, but not really Tech. This should be good. It won’t really feel like work tryin’ to get through the whole project.

Track 1: Stars (Prod. Seven)

This beat is fucking incredible. Tech’s flow is on point. His voice sounds kind of different. I don’t know if that’s just me or if it actually sounds different because he was younger. He’s pretty much just rappin’ about how he’s gettin’ better and better with age. “Never will I ever stop or quit what I’m doing / I’m getting better, even clever…” Oh. What the… fuck? This fucking hook is so fucking bad. Someone’s singin’ about how “We’ve landed!” Is that Krizz Kaliko? It sounds way too overdramatic and it’s pitch shifted for some reason. This hook is fucking horrible. God damnit. It’s always the hooks. This beat is fucking crazy and Tech murdered it, but the hook is so awful. I’m listening to the hook right now… It’s just so terrible. I hate this hook. FUCK! This song would definitely be dope af if it weren’t for the hook. It’s so bad. Tech fucking killed it tho. God damnit. FUCK! I really want to like this, but the hook is just too much. I can’t do this. It’s okay I guess. 3/5

Track 2: Welcome To Strangeland Feat. Krizz Kaliko (Prod. Jomeezius The Genius)

Krizz Kaliko better not fuck this hook up. Oh. This is great. Krizz is on the first verse. His verse was dope. Okay, the hook was about to start, but I paused it right before it happened. I think he’s about to start singin’. Hopefully he doesn’t fuck up. He doesn’t always ruin songs when he sings the hooks, but it isn’t rare. I’m about to press play. Huh. Well… It definitely lives up to the name because this is weird af. It’s not horrible, but his delivery is kinda corny. I’m ’bout to rewind and listen to the hook again. I think the hook might be bad, but it’s not bad enough to ruin the whole song. I definitely coulda did without it tho. It was definitely corny… It’s not that bad tho. Tech N9ne just mentioned Juggalos. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Juggalos. Insane Clown Posse is the most fucked up, stupid, fucked up, ridiculous, fucked up, horrible, fucked up, corny, fucked up, lame, fucked up shit that I have ever heard. Kinda wish Tech N9ne never mentioned them. If I go to a Tech N9ne concert, I really don’t want to see any Juggalos there. That would be fucking terrible. I don’t like going to concerts in the first place, but that would just make it so much worse. This beat is alright I guess. Eh. I don’t know. If I keep this song I’ll probably never listen to it again. It’s just kinda corny. “I love it Eep Op Ork Ah Ah.” That’s a Jetsons reference. I don’t know if that’s cool or lame. I think it might be lame. This song isn’t terrible, but I just can’t do it. The beat wasn’t anything special. The verses were all cool. Tech said some corny shit (Krizz did too tbh) and the hook is just not that good. Nah. This is alright I guess. I won’t be playin’ this shit again. 3/5

Track 3: Unfair Feat. Ces Cru & Krizz Kaliko (Prod. Seven)

If I end up disliking this song I’m gonna get worried. Hopefully he picks it up with this song. Ces Cru is dope af, so this should be good. I just hope Krizz has a verse and isn’t on the hook… When was Ces Cru signed to Strange? Tech is introducing them on the intro the same way he introduced Murs on Hard. I’m finna check right now. Oh wow. They weren’t even signed yet when this album dropped. They joined Strange Music in 2012. Weird. This beat is fuckin’ crazy. Wow. Tech’s fuckin’ killin’ it right now. “Wanna pla-ay every da-ay, sta-ay for the wa-ay that I spra-ay / Sa-ay, you gotta pa-ay, that’s ya-ay and ay-ay.” His flow is fucking great on this shit. YES! The hook is great! YES! HE DIDN’T FUCK UP THE HOOK! HE’S ACTUALLY RAPPIN’ THE HOOK INSTEAD OF SINGIN’ IT! YES! Krizz is spittin’ now. He fuckin’ killed it. This is fucking great. It’s great to hear all of them rappin’. No wack/overdramatic hook with Krizz singin’. Just a great Hip Hop song. Godemis is goin’ in now. “When I’m rappin’, out of habit I’m adamant gettin’ adam / But I would rather, hit a madam with a Magnum and split her atoms.” This is fucking great. Godemis fuckin’ killed it. Ubiquitous is goin’ in now. Holy fuck. Ubiquitous fucking murdered this shit. That was crazy. Goddamn. I fucking love this song. The beat is crazy. They all murdered they verses. The hook was actually good. This is fucking great. I highly recommend watching that video up there because they all fucking killed that shit. I fuck with this shit. This shit is fuckin’ dope af. 5/5

Track 4: Kocky Feat. Jay Rock & Kutt Calhoun (Prod. David Sanders II)

Replacing C’s with K’s is a lot less dumb than replacing C’s with B’s. If you have no idea what I’m talkin’ about, just forget it. I don’t feel like explainin’ that stupid shit. This song is about to be hard af. This is so gangsta. Kutt Calhoun is goin’ the fuck in right now. It’s a shame that he left Strange Music… I feel like Strange Music is a lot less gangsta since Kutt Calhoun and Jay Rock both left. What the fuck? Krizz Kaliko just came out of nowhere with a hook. He’s singin’, but it doesn’t sound overdramatic at all. It actually fits in well with this song. I like it. Jay Rock is goin’ the fuck in right now. HAHAHAHA! “Pillow talking to them hoes, you all the way gay.” Tech did his thing. This is dope. It doesn’t really stand out that much and it’s kinda boring compared to the previous track, but it’s still pretty good. I fuck with this. This is dope. 4/5

Track 5: Who Do I Catch (Prod. Seven)

This beat has a background singer kinda like Mackenzie O’Guin in Fear, except it sounds a lot less sad. It’s dope af. Wait a minute… I’ve heard this verse before… Yeah, this is the same verse that he spat for that B.E.T. Cypher he was in with B.o.B, MGK, Big K.R.I.T. & Kendrick Lamar.

“I popped eyes open without eating me canned spinach.” His verse sounds a lot better on this beat too. The hook is dope. This is great. I’ve heard the first verse, but I always thought it was dope af. The other verses are all great too. The beat is fucking dope and so is the hook. I fuck with this. This is dope af. 5/5

Track 6: My Favorite Feat. Prozak & Brotha Lynch Hung (Prod. Jomeezius The Genius)

The only shit that I’ve heard from Prozak & Brotha Lynch Hung is they verses on the Strangeulation Cypher. I really liked Brotha Lynch Hung’s verse. Prozak wasn’t bad, but he definitely had my least favorite verse. What the fuck…? DID THIS MOTHERFUCKER MAKE A SONG ABOUT FOOD??? This… Is this a song about Tech N9ne’s favorite food? “After the shows I’m thinking about food / Just give me some vittles and drink and I’m cool / You probably thinking that a women’s on mind too / But I drool over Italian cooking its my jewel.” What the fuck? At first I thought he was just opening up with a line about food, but he just keeps goin’ on and on about chicken and P.F. Chang’s and shit. “Can’t stop eatin’, I really love eatin’.” Okay, he isn’t just talkin’ about his favorite food. It’s about how he eats so much and how his blood pressure is high. This is a weird ass topic. I don’t know if I like it. I honestly… don’t give a fuck about his blood pressure. What the fuck? Krizz Kaliko’s singin’ the hook and it’s pretty fuckin’ terrible. This is corny af. Why is Krizz Kaliko uncredited? Probably because he was so ashamed of that wack hook… Wow. Prozak is actually goin’ the fuck off. He’s rappin’ about takin’ a bunch of drugs. I guess this song is really about addiction. Tech is addicted to food. That’s… That’s just fucking stupid. I mean, food addiction is probably a real thing, but who wanted to hear a song about that? Maybe if this song didn’t sound so serious it wouldn’t feel so corny. They’re trying to make food addiction sound so dark tho. This hook is horrible. Brotha Lynch Hung’s verse wasn’t bad. He was talkin’ about both food & drugs. Nah. I’m not feelin’ this. Tech’s flow was on point, but I don’t give a fuck about his food addiction. This song actually made me hungry. Prozak definitely had the best verse. The beat wasn’t that good. Brotha Lynch’s verse was alright. The hook was fucking horrible. If this was only about drugs then it would be cool, but I can’t take this shit seriously. I’m not feelin’ this. This is wack. 2/5

Track 7: Retrogression Feat. ¡MayDay! (Prod. Plex Luthor)

Tech is singin’ on the intro. It’s not really enough for me to say whether it’s good or bad. It’s definitely not bad… It’s just kinda there. This beat is dope af. It’s so smooth. He’s talkin’ about being addicted to drugs. Okay, now he’s rappin’ about havin’ sex… I actually have no idea what this song is about anymore. Oh. I guess he’s personifying the drugs as some chick that he’s smashin’. He’s singin’ on the hook; it’s alright. Wrekonize is goin’ in now. He kinda has this weird valley-girl accent. I don’t really know how to describe it. I liked his verse tho. The hook is a little corny. Bernz’s verse was actually pretty goddamn good. This song isn’t bad, but it doesn’t really stand out that much. It’s not something I’d wanna listen to more than once. The hook could’ve been a little better, but I’m glad Tech did it himself instead of getting Krizz Kaliko to do it. That wouldn’t have worked. When he starts yellin’ that’s when the hook starts to go down hill. I wouldn’t have liked the song that much more if he didn’t yell, but it was still kinda bad. So yeah. This is a decent song. I just won’t be returning to it. 3/5

Track 8: Bang Out (816 Boyz) [Prod. Seven]

The 816 Boyz is apparently a group comprised of Tech N9ne, Krizz Kaliko, Kutt Calhoun & Makzilla. I have no idea who Makzilla is. Hopefully he’s dope. I don’t know why I always say shit like that. It kinda goes without saying that I don’t wanna hear wack music. This beat is dope af. HOLY FUCK THIS BEAT IS FUCKIN’ CRAZY. He’s just talkin’ about fuckin’. “If they came to Nina with tight cats / They end up loose as a goose they pussies to ice packs / Real life Jack, they can be white, black, nice, fat / Just need a crevice to put my pipe at.” Jesus. I don’t know about these lyrics. I’d be lyin’ if I said they didn’t make me a little uncomfortable. This is honestly pretty… Lol wtf is this shit? This song is fuckin’ stupid. The hook is so fuckin’ stupid. One of them (not sure who) is sayin’, “Told me to bang, bang, bang / Like it ain’t a thang, thang, thang” and then some chick starts sayin’ shit and it’s just fuckin’ stupid. It’s not nearly as bad as Dwamn, but still. It’s fuckin’ stupid. Jesus. I honestly think that this song might be fucking terrible. Krizz Kaliko just said, “Ayo fat girls, come ‘ere are you ticklish? / I’m mad niggerish, pull out the licorice.” I wasn’t feelin’ his verse. I’m not even really feelin’ this topic. There are so many other songs with this same topic that are far less graphic. I don’t wanna hear about Tech N9ne beatin’ up “paninis.” Kutt Calhoun has the next verse. God. It just feels like whenever Tech gets a more energetic beat like this he always goes in about some generic or stereotypical subject. I don’t care about how much you like to have sex. Most men do. I didn’t need you’re confirmation. “But I’m a Capricorn I’m packed like I’m strapped for porn / I whip the pussy like slave masters, they backs is torn.” This is just fucking horrible. I did like Kutt’s aggressive delivery, but his lyrics were just offensive. Makzilla’s verse wasn’t very good either… “And I’m snorin’, in my PJ’s bitch I’m snorin’ / Wakin’ up like OMG, O-OMG white girl alarm.” This song is fucking terrible. Not even the great beat could save this shit. This is wack af. 1/5

Track 9: Beautiful Music (Prod. Jomeezius The Genius)

Oh. My. GOD. THIS FUCKING BEAT IS ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE. YOOOOOOOOO! THIS SHIT IS CRAZY.

DAT BEAT THOOOOOO

This beat is fucking phenomenal. It’s got these horns in the background and I guess it sounds like a DJ Mustard beat. Except it’s not fucking terrible. Maybe if somebody went to DJ Dahi or Childish Major and said, “Make a DJ Mustard beat that doesn’t suck ass” they would come up with something like this. It’s fucking great. Tech’s flow is on point. Krizz Kaliko is on the hook. It’s not that bad tho. I actually kinda like it. It is a little extreme I guess, but I don’t really mind it here. I think he did it well. All of Tech’s verses were great, especially the first one. “Picture me painting pretty pussy with a pen and pad / And picking a pair of provocative peaches to press to the pace.” This is how you make a good song about your sexual adventures. I fuck with this song. This is dope af. 5/5

Track 10: Won’t You Come Dirty Feat. Stevie Stone & Young Bleed (Prod. Jomeezius The Genius)

According to Wikipedia, Young Bleed was signed to a subsidiary of Strange Music, Strange Lane Records, from 2010 to 2012. There is currently nobody signed to Strange Lane Records. I’ve never heard of Young Bleed, but if he was signed to Strange then he was probably dope, right? God I hope so. On the intro, Tech N9ne said, “Ima hold them buns sturdy.” I hate it when people refer to booty cheeks as “buns.” It just doesn’t sound right to me. This is the third consecutive song where the main subject is sex. I think he did it well on Beautiful Music, but this is just as bad if not worse than Bang Out. “Plop is the sound it makes / Plop plop plop till the ground breaks.” I should give this song a 1 just for that terrible line. The beat is pretty grating. It kinda sounds like EDM. Not really tho. His flow is pretty subdued compared to his other songs. This might just be the worst Tech N9ne verse of all time. This hook is terrible. Someone’s singin’ with this weird robotic effect. It’s not autotune. I don’t know how to describe it. It isn’t good tho. Young Bleed’s goin’ in now. His verse was definitely better than Tech’s, but that honestly isn’t sayin’ much. It was pretty standard. Nothin’ out of the ordinary about his verse. It was still bad, just better than Tech’s. I’m not exactly sure what it was, but I do know that he said, “my chinny chin chin” at one point. Stevie Stone is goin’ in now. Stevie Stone’s delivery and flow sounded great over this beat, but they lyrics just weren’t very good. I guess he did all he could with this topic, but I’m not feelin’ it. This is terrible honestly. This is very far from a good song. This is so bad. The beat was loud and annoying. I’m not feelin’ the topic. The verses were all pretty bad. Nah. I ain’t feelin’ this shit at all. This is wack af. 1/5

Track 11: Sad Circus Feat. Brotha Lynch Hung & Courtney Kuhnz (Prod. Seven)

Sad Circus? This is probably gonna be very overdramatic. There’s a carnival announcer who’s sayin’ shit like, “COME ONE, COME ALL TO THE SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD CIRCUUUUUUUUUUSSSSS!” Nah. I’m sorry, but Tech’s gotta stop putting fucking corny ass lame ass dumb ass bullshit like that in his music. Fuck. Tech is rappin’ about how he’s divorced and lonely. This is indeed very sad. The placement of the last few songs actually makes sense now. He mentioned that he fucked around with a lot of side chicks when he was married and that’s how he ended up alone. He definitely coulda left Won’t You Come Dirty & Bang Out off of this album tho. One song about sex would have sufficed. The beat sounds very… big. It sounds kind of cinematic I guess. Think about the music you hear at a carnival. Now make it sound sad. That’s what this beat is. The carnival aspect of this song is really weird, and not in a cool way. Courtney Kuhnz is singin’ the hook and she actually sounds pretty good, but the fuckin’ lyrics man… “Saddest story ever told.” That’s definitely not true. This isn’t even the saddest Tech N9ne song. It is sad tho. Brotha Lynch is gonna go in now. His verse is even more depressing tbh. His flow is great. “I’m starin’ at these pills, in the back of the Cadillac, and matta’ fact / I got it I grip my steel, I’m always on this suicide thinkin’ that’s how I feel.” Apparently him and Tech had a falling out around 2010. They squashed that shit tho. He’s rappin’ about how his life went downhill when he stopped makin’ music with Strange. Wow. Brotha Lynch Hung fucking murdered this shit. I know this is kinda fucked up to say, but I think the shit he rapped about was a lot more interesting than the shit Tech was sayin’. Just from the lyrics you can tell that he was very depressed and fucked up. Man I really wish I liked this more. The lame ass carnival idea behind this shit really holds it back. Brotha Lynch Hung’s verse was dope af. I love his verse, but… Well. I already said it a few times. The carnival thing… It’s just too much. I can’t fuck with this one. It’s alright tho. 3/5

Track 12: The Noose Feat. ¡MayDay! (Prod. Plex Luthor)

Wrekonize is singin’ the first verse. Wow. His verse was actually really fucking great. It sounded very poetic. “I’ve seen children harm each other like it’s second nature, some / Just want to watch the world burn and bang upon the drums / And that is why the music and the rhythm will live on / ‘Cause chaos has a melody and death is like a song.” He’s singing from the perspective of someone writing a suicide letter. Tech is rappin’ now. He apparently visited a military camp and he’s rappin’ about the fucked up shit that he saw there. This song is so fuckin’ deep. Wrek’s hook is great. The beat is really laid back and smooth, but it sounds very sad at the same time. Bernz did his thing on the last verse too. This song is great. Wrekonize kinda stole the show… You could really hear the emotion in his voice when he was singing. Bernz & Tech N9ne were still dope tho. I definitely fuck with this song. They’re actually talkin’ about shit that matters and making people think about stuff that’s goin’ on in the world. This song is dope af. 5/5

Track 13: Slave Feat. Krizz Kaliko & Kutt Calhoun (Prod. Seven)

Krizz Kaliko is on the first verse. This beat is dope. Krizz started singin’ at the end of his verse and it actually sounded pretty goddamn good. His hook is dope. It doesn’t sound overdramatic or anything. It actually fits over this beat really well. It sounds very soulful. This whole song is just smooth af. Kutt Calhoun actually has kind of a melodic delivery and it sounds really soulful. His flow is on point. Tech is actually singin’ too. He sounds good. If you’ve ever heard anything by Watch The Duck, it kinda sounds like that minus the terrible dubstep breaks. It sounds like a spiritual. Like the religious songs that slaves used to sing while they were working. There just aren’t a lot of religious themes to this song. It’s about working really hard like a slave. I definitely fuck with this. It’s smooth af and they all did they thing. This is dope af. 5/5

Track 14: Overwhelming Feat. Jay Da 3rd (Prod. Beats 4 Days LLC)

I have no idea who Jay Da 3rd or Beats 4 Days LLC are. Woah. This beat is great. It’s led by a piano and it sounds great. He’s basically just rappin’ about his career and how all of his fans support him. Oh my God. This hook is really really really bad. The part where Jay Da 3rd starts sayin’, “OVERWHELMING!” ain’t that bad, but it’s the part right before that where he says, “I opened up my heart, showed you what I had inside / An ocean full of truth, too deep for the lies / You made it to the pain, had to swim through the pride / There’s nothing else I need to survive.” It just sounds terrible and corny. Tech’s flow is great and everything. The hook is just so bad tho. I can’t take it. I’m neutral on the topic. The hook is just not for me. I can’t do this. It’s really not that bad of a song, but the hook ruined it for me. It’s alright. 3/5

Track 15: Gods Feat. Krizz Kaliko & Kutt Calhoun (Prod. Seven)

Krizz Kaliko is singin’ on the hook. He doesn’t sound that bad. Oh. Oh my God. Some female vocals came in. She sounds like a member of a church choir. She sounds terrible. She’s saying, “Do you believe? Believe?! BELIEVE! / Do you believe? Do you BELIEEEEEEEEEVE?” It’s horrible. This hook is horrible. Krizz is on the first verse. I guess this beat is dope. This song is just so fucking corny. They’re calling themselves musical gods. I just can’t take this shit. Kutt’s on the second verse. His verse was actually pretty goddamn good. This hook is just so fucking horrible. Tech N9ne’s verse was dope, but I just can’t do this shit. This is bad. I’m not feelin’ this shit. This is wack. 2/5

Final Thoughts:

This is definitely the second worst Tech N9ne album I’ve heard so far. I thought this would be a lot better since it was shorter, but nah. It wasn’t really a bad album, but compared to the other shit I’ve heard from him this was pretty underwhelming. As usual, my main gripes are the hooks and subject matter. The production is pretty good for the most part and Tech’s flow is always on point. The hooks were very inconsistent. Sometimes Krizz Kaliko would sound fine, but other times he just sounds way too excited to be singing. It’s great that he has passion and everything, but when he makes everything sound like Opera it’s pretty hard to take seriously. He just makes things feel overdramatic. The rap features were all pretty good. Tech’s definitely at his best when he’s rappin’ about more serious topics or about how dope he is as a rapper. He’s at his worst when he’s rapping about sex or random shit like food. He can rap about sex if he wants to, but he really shouldn’t do it for three consecutive songs. It starts to get old after the 3rd verse. This isn’t a bad album tho. If you’ve never listened to a Tech N9ne project, I would recommend starting with Something Else or Strangeulation, but if you’re a fan you’ll probably enjoy this. I don’t really like it that much personally, but I think it’s a decent project. It has a shit load of flaws, but it’s an okay album.

Favorite Song: The Noose

Least Favorite Song: Won’t You Come Dirty

Verdict:

66%

MEH

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